I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
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