omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
This girl wants me to lick her pits
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society