I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
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