I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Randomize
