What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
