your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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