David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Randomize
