My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
