I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
