Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
the room spins SO much faster in panama
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
