I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Randomize
