Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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