That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
