Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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