I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
