Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Randomize
