Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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