It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize