if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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