White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize
