I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize