yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize
