You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
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Life is so much better after having sex.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
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Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
His nipple licking is glorious
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