I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
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I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
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Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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