she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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