How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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