Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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