We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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