I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
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And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
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I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
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