So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
