My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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