Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
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