I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize