8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
