vagina is talking i cant
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
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