morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Randomize
