so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Randomize
