spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
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