Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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