Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
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