You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
