I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
vagina is talking i cant
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Randomize
