wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
he was CRYING into my vagina
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Randomize
