I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize