I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
