therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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