oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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