that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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