windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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