if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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