apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
