the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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